On the soap box Again

images (10)
While all the LGBT groups around the country,are celebrating and patting them selves on the back for what they consider a great victory none of them has managed to thank the person who really got this done. So I will indeed thank her here very publicly.
Thank You Edith “Edie” Windsor for your great contribution and courage to see this all through and thank you for challenging this in the courts So that so many others of us might reap the benefits Associated with your great loss.
So many times I have spoken out about LGB—————————-T organizations As usual  the gay community is acting like it was all their doing that getting section three of D.O.M.A. thrown out out by SCOTUS. When in fact almost none of their resources got this law overturned. When frankly they should have piled on and gotten the entire law challenged and overthrown. This was an opportunity missed by them in my opinion. and would have set equality standards across the nation instead of just in states that allow Same sex unions.I don’t think D.O.M.A. should ever have been signed into law by then President Clinton in the first place. What gives the government the right to define marriage in their narrow view in the first place.
Anyway all this latest stuff  about D.O.M.A. was really started when Edie  Windsor filed her case which was this,

United States v. Windsor570 U.S. ___ (2013), is a landmark case[1][2][3] in which the United States Supreme Court held Section 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) to be unconstitutional under the Due Process Clause of the Fifth Amendment.

Edith Windsor and Thea Spyer, a same-sex couple residing in New York, were lawfully married in Ontario, Canada, under the provisions set forth in the Canadian Civil Marriage Act, in 2007. The validity of their marriage was subsequently recognized by New York under common-law principles of comity. Spyer died in 2009, leaving her entire estate to Windsor. Because their marriage was valid under New York law, Windsor sought to claim the federal estate tax exemption forsurviving spouses. She was barred from doing so by Section 3 of DOMA, which provided that the term “spouse” only applies to a marriage between a man and woman. In effect, the Internal Revenue Service found that the exemption did not apply to same-sex marriages, denied Windsor’s claim, and compelled her to pay $363,053 in estate taxes.

On November 9, 2010, a lawsuit was filed against the federal government in the United States District Court for the Southern District of New York, where Windsor sought a refund because DOMA singled out legally married same-sex couples for “differential treatment compared to other similarly situated couples without justification.”[4] On February 23, 2011, U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder issued a statement from the Obama administration that agreed with the plaintiff’s position that DOMA violated the U.S. Constitution and said he would no longer defend the law in court. On April 18, 2011, Paul Clement, representing the Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group (BLAG) continued defense of the law. On June 6, 2012, Judge Barbara S. Jones ruled that Section 3 of DOMA was unconstitutional under the due process guarantees of the Fifth Amendment and ordered the federal government to issue the tax refund, including interest. The U.S. Second Circuit Court of Appealsaffirmed the decision on October 18, 2012.

BLAG and the U.S. Department of Justice (DOJ) appealed the decision to the U.S. Supreme Court, which granted a writ of certiorari in December 2012. On March 27, 2013, the court heard oral arguments. On June 26, 2013, the U.S. Supreme Court issued a 5–4 decision declaring Section 3 of DOMA to be unconstitutional “as a deprivation of the liberty of the person protected by the Fifth Amendment.”[5]:25

Challenging section two at the same time would have been good but now in some of the dissenting comments by a couple of Justices they think it must be challenged based on the 14th Amendment.

While I’m happy for the presidents position in all this I’m sure the LGB___________________T community will no doubt heap all praise on him as he is their hero.

Truth is he hasn’t signed one piece of legislation that helps us since he got into office,He uses executive caveat to go around congress on almost everything why didn’t he do so on D.O.M.A.

Anyway the real Hero here is Edith “Edie Windsor So kudos to you Edie from


PS here’s how really confused they are

when you look up the acronym LGBTQIA that they now bandy about here is what you find,

RankAbbr.Meaning*LGBTQIALesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transexual, Questioning, Intersex, Asexual*LGBTQIALesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Intersex and Asexual*LGBTQIALesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning, Intersex and Allies

A little confusing when they use it which do they mean?

Bye again Butterfly


Listen: Social Security Administration Community Call

Relaxing these requirements for transgenders may help end a lot of embarrassing moments for people like me.

National Center for Transgender Equality's Blog

Last week, NCTE’s Director of Policy Harper Jean Tobin and Executive Director Mara Keisling hosted a community call with some of our friends and supporters to discuss the Social Security Administration (SSA)’s recent changes. That entire conversation can be listened here.

For the past seven years NCTE has led an effort with our allies to amend the requirements for changing gender designation on social security records and last week SSA finally responded. Previously SSA required a surgeon’s letter in order to change an individual’s gender marker, but the agency will now accept any of the following: a passport or birth certificate with an amended gender designation, a court order, or a physician’s letter that states the applicant has had “appropriate clinical treatment for gender transition.” This language is very important for making this change more accessible to more people. Although healthcare providers are still gatekeepers of identity, there is…

View original post 341 more words

My head still in the clouds

968894_420566358040952_1758702389_n1011202_595326130498950_950156242_n1003093_420576178039970_21888851_n972166_420522468045341_192328242_nThree Saturdays ago I attended Indy Pridefest, It’s the largest gathering of LGBT people I’ve ever attended ,It was like an LGBT Woodstock for me,around two hundred thousand people on the American Legion Mall in downtown Indianapolis,One of the biggest events of it’s kind in the nation. The Parade one of the longest of it’s kind. I’m staggered that there are really so many of us these days It gives me hope that we are in fact winning our way to freedom as a social group.941337_419065724857682_1639052189_n943255_420109828086605_1504993047_n968885_420462838051304_1520350705_n980561_420577184706536_1087004424_o942383_10152916273745556_1638303635_n

great bands booths and food a day I will hold in my memories forever,one big WOW.


Remembering the Horror

40 yrs ago today the largest LBGT massacre took place in New Orleans at the Upstairs lounge,this is one the most horrific things to ever happen and it barely made the news at all you will never believe how far we have come in our civil rights struggle until you watch this.



Soapbox Shelle

transformationIt’s been a little over three years now since I began to be on hormone therapy to feminize my body and finally make it conform to a more likeable to me look.

There have indeed been tremendous changes that have taken place,some good and some not so good. It’s a journey that so many of us begin with great expectations of being changed from the miserable male bodies we inhabit to a more pleasant form that doesn’t repulse us when we look in the mirror.Certainly not all of us including me ever reach beauty queen status  but the changes are in fact very queenly to us.

At first the changes were very subtle but I think what I noticed early on was the calm it brought to my mind,I had no idea that this change would be so dramatic but for it I’m extremely thankful.

Now I’m going to get a little controversial,there are thousands of us out here doing HRT and for the most part we go to a private or government endocrinologist IE the VA to get our HRT and there seems to be a standard set of drugs that are prescribed for most of us It seems pretty universal over the main stream  with a few variations thrown in. I myself did endless hours of research before choosing the drugs I use,I think I’m probably more informed about these drugs than the Drs. who treat most of us let’s be real for a minute how many of you have ever ask your Dr. for credentials in their experience in treating transgenders? I’d be willing to bet most endo’s  do routine treatment of non gender variants and don’t specifically treat transgender’s. I’m sure my continuing research now approaching hundreds of hours and endless reading would rival most of them’s knowledge on the issue of HRT,I think most of them are just winging it in an attempt to do what they think is right but I would bet if you were to ask them informed questions they would soon be lost.(example; it’s standard practice in the U.S. to prescribe spirolactone as an anti-androgen) while this drug does have some effect in this area it was really a diuretic and blood pressure medication. I myself take a blood pressure medication which will not allow me to take this drug so I researched long and hard for some alternative that would work with my medication. I finally decided to use Cyproterone acetate (Androcur)It is not just an anti-androgen it was developed for use in prostate cancer and a drug used to chemically castrate men IE sex offenders.It not only shuts down the production of testosterone in the testes it also shuts  down the production in the hypothalamus.It comes however with some side effects,weight gain and loss of sexual desire as well as shutting down the production of sexual fluids. I don’t need to go into detail on that I hope.I know several persons who use the spirolactone who are able to continue to be sexually active and fully functional some of this is gone for me forever though I still have the desire and can be stimulated to orgasm,though the fluids are not there anymore. This has taken a while to happen but it is happening just the same.Also in most camps progesterone doesn’t usually get prescribed while it also blocks the production of testosterone it is shown to be of significant help in the growth of breasts in transgender’s. This is also part of my HRT.My Gp monitors my levels every three months and so far they are exactly at the levels of a Cis-gendered woman . I encourage that all trans-persons be monitored on a regular basis as many of these drugs can have harsh side effects.But please if you want great results question your provider and if they don’t have very sharp answers to your questions be leery about their experience and find out the answer to your questions. It’s your life,you will only have one chance to live it.


Misplaced loyalties and random twists of fate



Today I went to the local newspaper to post my legal notice’s which are 3 in all on different days in the legal section of  the paper stating my request to formally and legally change my name from the given male name given me at birth,to the chosen name I have picked  by my own choosing  as a transgender. By some random twist of fate the first of these notices will appear on this coming Sunday,which happens to also be fathers day. It is not my intention to be hurtful in any way to my son in all this but it seems it couldn’t have really come on a worst day for him. I do hope and pray that he will understand in time that this process I have set in motion is an extension of a  life  I have desperately  played out over most of my life and that I can’t or won’t turn back from what I feel must be. Sometimes it is just too important to choose sanity over the feelings of others,not that I don’t have great compassion for how very painful it is for the people I have touched in life along my tortured road to freedom. For this and other discretion’s that may occur in the future I humbly apologize and beg forgiveness.


On another note I was informed by someone very close to me that he would be leaving my life if not forever at least for some time. I guess we never know when we make decisions of the heart just how they will play out in the long run but try we must to give of ourselves unselfishly.



I guess though in some back area of our mind we always have some expectation of receiving back for the love given,often it just doesn’t work out to that end. But for the other person to just put your life on hold and expect you to allow them free exit and entry to yours seems a little more than what should be allowed in the normal state of affairs,if there is indeed a normal state of affairs.To all of us some measure of pain is expected in closeness of the heart but it becomes old hat after time,and life is too short to allow this to be accepted always in our lives.

Not that I don’t think for even a minute I won’t make this mistake again,It will always be in my nature to give of myself,regardless of the end outcome.    Just saying!!!!!!!!!


Something else coming soon I know.


Looking back to kinder cultures



In many cultures transgender were revered as people with two spirits,and sometimes were the spiritual leaders or shaman in some.

The Judeo-Christian culture however is mostly responsible for making us something to be ashamed of in our modern culture,the ethics of the European culture are responsable  for the prejudices against us in the modern world and those prejudices and the misinformation in our culture have led to us having for so long  to hide our selves and live in misery and pain for much of our lives and even have led to the death of many of us. The times seem to be softening  some of this but what is deeply ingrained in a culture will never disappear completely I think.

For those tolerant enough to expose yourselves to openness of thought and willing to interact with us I think you will find we are indeed people with two spirits and can enrich your lives immensely if you are willing to engage with us.

We have been around  since the dawn of civilization and in every culture  and not been shunned until more modern times perhaps we should all take a long look at our culture and bring forth a renaissance of the way we were treated by more ancient and civilized cultures.

The ‘two-spirit’ people of indigenous North Americans

  • Walter L Williams
A two spirit Native American

We-Wa, a Zuni two-spirit, weaving

Native Americans have often held intersex, androgynous people, feminine males and masculine females in high respect. The most common term to define such persons today is to refer to them as “two-spirit” people, but in the past feminine males were sometimes referred to as “berdache” by early French explorers in North America, who adapted a Persian word “bardaj”, meaning an intimate male friend. Because these androgynous males were commonly married to a masculine man, or had sex with men, and the masculine females had feminine women as wives, the term berdache had a clear homosexual connotation. Both the Spanish settlers in Latin America and the English colonists in North America condemned them as “sodomites”.

Rather than emphasising the homosexuality of these persons, however, many Native Americans focused on their spiritual gifts. American Indian traditionalists, even today, tend to see a person’s basic character as a reflection of their spirit. Since everything that exists is thought to come from the spirit world, androgynous or transgender persons are seen as doubly blessed, having both the spirit of a man and the spirit of a woman. Thus, they are honoured for having two spirits, and are seen as more spiritually gifted than the typical masculine male or feminine female.

Therefore, many Native American religions, rather than stigmatising such persons, often looked to them as religious leaders and teachers. Quite similar religious traditions existed among the native peoples of Siberia and many parts of Central and southeast Asia. Since the ancestors of Native Americans migrated from Siberia over 20,000 years ago, and since reports of highly respected androgynous persons have been noted among indigenous Americans from Alaska to Chile, androgyny seems to be quite ancient among humans.

Rather than the physical body, Native Americans emphasised a person’s “spirit”, or character, as being most important. Instead of seeing two-spirit persons as transsexuals who try to make themselves into “the opposite sex”, it is more accurate to understand them as individuals who take on agender status that is different from both men and women. This alternative gender status offers a range of possibilities, from slightly effeminate males or masculine females, to androgynous or transgender persons, to those who completely cross-dress and act as the other gender. The emphasis of Native Americans is not to force every person into one box, but to allow for the reality of diversity in gender and sexual identities.

Most of the evidence for respectful two-spirit traditions is focused on the native peoples of the Plains, the Great Lakes, the Southwest, and California. With over a thousand vastly different cultural and linguistic backgrounds, it is important not to overgeneralise for the indigenous peoples of North America. Some documentary sources suggest that a minority of societies treated two-spirit persons disrespectfully, by kidding them or discouraging children from taking on a two-spirit role. However, many of the documents that report negative reactions are themselves suspect, and should be evaluated critically in light of the preponderance of evidence that suggests a respectful attitude. Some European commentators, from early frontier explorers to modern anthropologists, also were influenced by their own homophobic prejudices to distort native attitudes.

Two-spirit people were respected by native societies not only due to religious attitudes, but also because of practical concerns. Because their gender roles involved a mixture of both masculine and feminine traits, two-spirit persons could do both the work of men and of women. They were often considered to be hard workers and artistically gifted, of great value to their extended families and community. Among some groups, such as the Navajo, a family was believed to be economically benefited by having a “nadleh” (literally translated as “one who is transformed”) androgynous person as a relative. Two-spirit persons assisted their siblings’ children and took care of elderly relatives, and often served as adoptive parents for homeless children.

A feminine male who preferred to do women’s work (gathering wild plants or farming domestic plants) was logically expected to marry a masculine male, who did men’s work (hunting and warfare). Because a family needed both plant foods and meat, a masculine female hunter, in turn, usually married a feminine female, to provide these complementary gender roles for economic survival. The gender-conforming spouse of two-spirit people did not see themselves as “homosexual” or as anything other than “normal”.

In the 20th-century, as homophobic European Christian influences increased among many Native Americans, respect for same-sex love and for androgynous persons greatly declined. Two-spirit people were often forced, either by government officials, Christian missionaries or their own community, to conform to standard gender roles. Some, who could not conform, either went underground or committed suicide. With the imposition of Euro-American marriage laws, same-sex marriages between two-spirit people and their spouses were no longer legally recognised. But with the revitalisation of Native American “red power” cultural pride since the 60s, and the rise of gay and lesbian liberation movements at the same time, a new respect for androgyny started slowly re-emerging among American Indian people.

Because of this tradition of respect, in the 90s many gay and lesbian Native American activists in the United States and Canada rejected the French word berdache in favour of the term two-spirit people to describe themselves. Many non-American Indians have incorporated knowledge of Native American two-spirit traditions into their increasing acceptance of same-sex love, androgyny and transgender diversity. Native American same-sex marriages have been used as a model for legalising same-sex marriages, and the spiritual gifts of androgynous persons have started to become more recognised.



Just some thoughts I wanted to share with you all.