The Grand Experiment

 After having little or no luck finding that special someone to make a life connection with, at the urging of an old friend I reluctantly placed an ad on Craigslist.

What ensued was no real eye opener when you advertise that you are a trans-person seeking a relationship you can be assured that every male pervert in the country will contact you seeking you know what.

In the 2 months my add was up and by the way( it was specific to say I was seeking a long term relationship )I had no less than 200 replies about 90% were married men wanting a little something on the side because their wife wasn’t all that anymore or wasn’t affording them the sex they thought they needed, and they wanted to try something new. The other ten percent were just guys who wanted to hook up.

I had in my ad I ask for a picture and an explanation as to why they wished to be with a girl like me,of course as with most sites men do not read they see a picture and it’s enough to get them going and damn anything else you had there to say.

While the pictures I had in mind would give me an Idea of what the person looked like and in most cases you can look into someone’s eyes and tell a lot about them from jump street.What I got However was enough pictures of Penis’s to write a porn magazine.Of course none of these responses were even answered. mixed in were some who were stealthy enough to just hide the fact that they were married in hopes of meeting up and getting their chance.

One of these who I corresponded with finally after I scolded him for being unfaithful  began a dialog with me based on the fact that his daughter was FTM transsexual we ended up being friends and still correspond today. Turned out to be a very nice man after I got to know him.

I won’t repeat many of the replies as it’s just plain ugly what men feel they have the right to say to you because you are transsexual.

All the bad stuff aside when I finally thought I had enough abuse at my own hand,and made a decision to take down my ad I received a reply from a man who had indeed read my ad and sent me a wonderful description of why he thought we might fit together,we began a dialog and  like some power from the spirit world was guiding us became almost instantly connected.

As our relationship continues to grow it seems to keep reinforcing the fact that we were meant to find each other and that forces from somewhere else are guiding this,I have fallen deeply in love with this wonderful man and the more we are together the more I know that I have indeed found the person I was destined to spend the rest of life with.

We have begun to make wedding plans and I don’t know  when I have ever been this happy in my life.

So what seemed a disaster at first has turned out to be my biggest blessing in life.

Butterfly

 

First experiences

 

Yesterday I saw my oncologist for the first time since my transition began,I had seen her Nurse practitioner,On my last few visits partly because she has me alternate visits with herself and nurse Becky  in case of emergency there is always someone available who is familiar with my case.In particular the last few visits she was not available so I saw Becky and there was a time span when the state took my mediciad benefits away.and then I waited until my medicare came into effect before returning.

I have always been extremely happy with my doctor there she is a very caring person who always treats as you her only patient, plus she has her office covered with butterflies imagine me liking that! also the people in the office and Dr. are huggers so I always get hugs and feel special there.(My son hates going with me for that reason he is not a hugger and finds it not to his liking).

On yesterdays visit her nurses and staff got me ready to see her updated my medications and paper work as needed and informed I was no longer a male patient but a female one,so along with my usual examination we drifted into a conversation about my new journey in life,she ask some great questions and commented in the end that she was proud of my courage and thanked me for sharing my story with her,and said I was her only  transgender patient.

Now on to the first experience during my exam she also did a breast examination,she ordered some blood tests,and a mammogram,which I will get on the 24th of the month. I knew that at some point in time this was likely to come up as a part of my treatment,either by her or my General practitioner.Well this is certainly a true first in my life and likely a memory that will become indelible in my mind.

I’m a little scared by it all but at the same time I know all involved are professionals,I guess we are always a bit scared of the unknown but after Oct,24th It will no longer be an unknown to me.

I will update all on the experience then.

 

Butterfly