Written on May 25th, 2012
When I first came here to the Experience project,I would never have dreamed in all my days that any of you would become my friend or even give me a second thought,I assumed incorrectly that you would look upon me as just another thrill seeking cross dresser,out to find some deviant sexual experience,I assure you this is not the case with me what I seek through a life time of pain is to be one of you.
For a time in my life I thought I hated you all for being born with what I so desperately wanted,you were born women and didn’t have to suffer like I did wanting to be one all my life and not understanding why I was so cruelly born in the wrong body and forced for most of my life to live as someone my mind said I wasn’t.
After becoming friends with many of you I began to realize just being born a woman doesn’t automatically give you a free ride to happiness,you lady’s suffer everyday just as I do to be respected and revered,you were not as I wrongly assumed given a free pass in life,John Lennon wrote a song called woman is the nigger of the world,I don’t like that word at all as I am not in the least little bit racist,but I guess he used it to point out how wrongly you all are treated in life.
As I grew up I look back at my life now and realize I was always hanging out with the women at family events and gatherings,because in my mind that’s where I belonged.So I guess you all started teaching me things at a young age,even though I didn’t at the time understand what was going on in my life I just knew I wasn’t normal some how.
During the times I was forced to be a man I learned how distasteful men’s thoughts about women are, I heard them say very disrespectful things about you and just cringed all the while thinking how could they be so cruel.
During my time here on EP I have been so lucky to have found a lot of very wonderful lady’s who have welcomed me with open arms and have helped change the way I think putting me on a path that has enriched my life in so many ways,you have taught me great humility,how to be kinder softer in my ways more caring and understanding,and so very much more about being the true woman I wish to be in life,Along with this gift you have all given me I feel it also comes with a great responsibility to carry myself properly in life and not bring shame to you and all you have so cordially given me. Thank you all for making me One of you, and for your understanding of how I have struggled like you in life.While I still don’t have all that you have in life I certainly have more than I had before I met you all,I will continue to seek the changes in my body that I feel will make me whole one day,but for now I’m thankful in many ways for all you are teaching me about life.